Talk:Village Presbyterian Church (Prairie Village, Kansas)

This article was nominated for deletion on 31 January 2014. The result of the discussion was Nomination withdrawn.

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The introduction is concise and to the point, I wouldn't change it unless there are other significant things about the church that people should definitely know if they skimmed the page.

Using context clues I was able to discern what PC(USA) meant but I think you should write out Presbyterian Church (USA) because it could be seen as jargon. (Although I'm sure the vast majority of people who visit this page would understand, it still helps with clarity)  :)

Good job with the citations, almost all claims are supported by (which I assume are all) secondary sources and most of the ones that aren't I doubt need them.

There are only two areas where I think references should be added, which are: 2nd sentence beginning with "Prairie Village was..." in the history section and the 2nd sentence in the Membership section beginning with "Located on the edge...".

It seems fine to me but I can see someone thinking the page's Community Involvement section is lacking so before you turn in your final with this page I would expand each of the community involvement programs subsections to 4-5 sentences each.

Sentences are well-written and flow between each other. They never feel "formulaic". I don't see any areas where someone may get confused.

Overall this is a good rough draft and I think if you just refined/expanded on what is existing this would be a solid page.

Here I two sources I think will help you with your research:

http://www.kansascity.com/news/local/community/joco-913/northeast-joco/article8873879.html

This one could work with a section on church music or worship? Not sure... http://www.richardsfowkes.com/pages/3instruments/22/22_index.php

-GraphiteDirigible

The introduction contains the essential information about the church that I would need if I just needed to look up something about the church.

I also agree that PC(USA) needs to be written out for sake of clarity. I noticed you used different ways to shorten Village Presbyterian Church such as: Village and Village Presbyterian. I think it would make for a better read if you chose one and used it throughout the article.

I thought your references were good, but I noticed you have some repeated sources with different numbers corresponding throughout the article. It's kind of a nitpicky thing, but you can add superscript letters to your references that will have just one number per reference.

Overall I think the sentence structure works throughout the article and I think this well be a very informative page once it's finished.

Kzwiener (talk) 04:26, 11 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]