The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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Reviewer: Vami IV (talk · contribs) 19:47, 9 April 2020 (UTC)Reply
Hello, and come what may from this review, thank you for your contributions to Wikipedia. During the review, I may make copyedits, which I will limit to spelling correction and minor changes to punctuation (removal of double spaces and such). I will only make substantive edits that change the flow and structure of the prose if I previously suggested and it is necessary. The Nominator(s) should understand that I am a grammar pedant, and I will nitpick in the interest of prose quality. For responding to my comments, please use 
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Removed, followed by any comment you'd like to make. I will be crossing out my comments as they are redressed, and only mine. A detailed, section-by-section review will follow. —♠Vami_IV†♠ 19:47, 9 April 2020 (UTC)Reply
Considering the size of this article, which I consider justified by the magnitude of the topic, the reviewee should know this will take a while. –♠Vami_IV†♠ 19:47, 9 April 2020 (UTC)Reply
of whom 459,511 part of the COMZwere part
Mulberry artificial portExpand the wikilink here to cover all three words.
weeks after the D-DayAxe "the".
the advance was much slower than the Operation Overlord anticipatedRephrase.
wear and tear, damageAren't these one and the same?
wear and tearand
and accidental damageshould be removed.
[...]; that to continue the pursuit beyond the Seine had long-term and far-reaching effects.Confusing.
? Seems clear enough. What is the confusion between? Hawkeye7 (discuss) 20:47, 12 April 2020 (UTC)Reply
The decision to abandon plans to develop the ports of Brittany left the American forces with only the port of Cherbourg and the Normandy beaches for their maintenance; that to continue the pursuit beyond the Seine had long-term and far-reaching effects.
[...] to stall the American advance.Changed "to stall" to "stalled".
Before World War II, the United States had developed War Plan Black for the possibility of a war with Germany.Can you give a date range for this?
Chaney opened SPOBS headquarters at US Embassy at 1 Grosvenor Square,A "the" is needed before "SPOBS" and "US Embassy".
Marshall and Harry L. HopkinsGive us the latter man's job title.
one of whom was selected by Somervell and Lee for Lee's SOS headquartersIs this man important enough to be mentioned here?
(OPD)This is the only time this abbreviation is used in the article, so it should be removed.
British Army's Scottish Command and Western Command;Change to "Scottish and Western Command" for brevity and consistency with
British Northern and Eastern Commands;
British Southern and South Eastern Commands"South Eastern Command" needs a wikilink.
and obtained the approval of the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom and the British Chiefs of Staff Committee for what became known as Operation Bolero, the buildup of US forces in the UK with the aim of eventually mounting a cross-channel attack.
Second Claridge ConferenceCan you elaborate on what this?
Y A series of meetings of the Combined Chiefs at Claridge's in London in July 1942. Deleted Conference name. The important point was that the decision was taken to undertake Torch instead of Sledgehammer, which makes Roundup impossible, and causes Overlord to occur in 1944. Hawkeye7 (discuss) 21:45, 5 May 2020 (UTC)Replyproposed 1942 cross-channel attack (Operation Sledgehammer) [...] invasion of French Northwest Africa (Operation Torch) [...] prospective 1943 cross-channel attack (Operation Roundup)I advise the combining of these into linked prose, rather than sequestered links, to take a bit out of the total article size.
This postponement, primary to gain extra month's production [...]Change "primary" to something else.
Another organization activated on 7 February, far more important as it turned out, was the Advance Section (ADSEC), under the command of Colonel Ewart G. Plank.Condense.
100 measurement tons (110 cubic metres) per day was set asidewere set aside?
Operation of the beachheads assigned to thewas assigned.
carrying at least [...] and often more. Latter is made redundant by "at least".
during the first ninety days"ninety" should be a numeral per MOS:NUMERAL
Not done MOS:NUMERAL: Integers greater than nine expressible in one or two words may be expressed either in numerals or in words.Hawkeye7 (discuss) 02:06, 6 May 2020 (UTC)Reply
British Brigadier G. C. BlackerBrigadier General?
Y The rank of brigadier general was abolished in the British Army in 1922, and replaced by the lesser rank of brigadier. Linked Brigadier (United Kingdom)A consolidated Class V (ammunition) dumpThis designation never comes up again in the article; just call it an ammo dump.
Cargo nets were spread out on the deck, and cargo piled on them. The cargo net with cargo inside was then lifted over the side on the ship's boom, and deposited in a waiting craft.Condense.
amphibious truck, known asDelete this comma.
In some cases, DUKWs ran out of fuel. When this happened, their pumps failed, and they sank.Any idea how many DUKWs were lost to this? I won't count it against the article if 'no'.
and occasionally causing one to capsize.One DUKW?
The unloading craftsuggests 'no', so I suggest "one" with "unloading craft".
This was resolved only when started being loaded with one category of supply only.Confusing. Resolved when DUKWs began being loaded with one category?
Cargo deposited on the beach at low tide and if not swiftly cleared was likely to be swamped by the rising tide.was deposited.
and there were normally only two quiet spells of good weather four days running between May and September.for four days, or of four days?
and you had to go out another one-half a mileRewrite.
but by October 1943 COSSAC was planning for two, with a second one at Saint-Laurent in the American sector.Condense.
Y Condensed. 01:24, 7 May 2020 (UTC)ponton causeways 10 June [...] The first pontoon causePontoon causeways. On 10 June.
Y From that article: "The spelling "ponton" in English dates from at least 1870. The use continued in references found in U.S. patents during the 1890s. It continued to be spelled in that fashion through World War II, when temporary floating bridges were used extensively throughout the European theatre. U.S. combat engineers commonly pronounced the word "ponton" rather than "pontoon" and U.S. military manuals spelled it using a single 'o'. The U.S. military differentiated between the bridge itself ("ponton") and the floats used to provide buoyancy ("pontoon")." Linked. Hawkeye7 (discuss) 21:04, 7 May 2020 (UTC)ReplyThe storm prompted emergency action.The storm discussed in "Mulberry harbor"?
The D-ration was chocolate bar.A chocolate bar.
which was unfortunate as it was those rations' primary sources of vitamin C.Delete "which was unfortunate" and move the rest to the front of the sentence. A la:
The lemon powder in the C and K rations, their primary sources of vitamin C, was particularly unpopular with the troops, who frequently discarded it or used it for things like scrubbing floors.
but it was found that both east and west molesboth the east and west
was being decantedwere being
of POL products by then"Products" is redundant.
subordinated to First Army [...] Indeed, First Army [...] when Twelfth United States Army Group and Third Armythe First Army, the Twelfth [..] and Third
with tents to accommodation 11,000 personnelaccommodate.
and then a Le Mansat?
so they were unloaded in the streamWhich stream?
French civilians were employed whenever possible.For what?
was initially restricted to hospital trains, and engineer supplies, and civil affairs relief.Too many "and"s.
ETOUSA has disapproved thishad disapproved of this
COMZ estimated that this requirewould require
neither the Ruhr nor the Saar was reached in 1944were reached
This was exacerbated by senior commanders [...] This was exacerbated by the poor supply disciplineThe latter of these two sentences immediately follows the former.
Good Article review progress box
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The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
