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This is a humorous essay.
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"Counting forks" is a mental exercise that was created by RGloucester after he was attacked by a battalion of content forks during the 2014 crisis in Ukraine. Whilst he had been fighting sporadic forks from March, he was not prepared for the volunteer paramilitary Fork Battalion that appeared on 27–28 August 2014 amidst an invasion by Russian troops into Ukraine. Having earlier fought many evil juntas, he remembered that the best way to confront encyclopaedic evils was to count them for hours on end. The idea of the exercise is to relax the mind before confronting content forks, point-of-view forks, and sensationalism, which harm the encyclopedia.
