John Stoltenberg (born 1944) is an American author, activist, magazine editor, college lecturer, playwright, and theater reviewer who identifies his political perspective as radical feminist. For several years he has worked for DC Metro Theater Arts and as of 2019[update] is its executive editor. He has written three books, two collections of his essays and a novel. He was the life partner of Andrea Dworkin for 30 years and has lived with his husband, Joe Hamilton, for over 15 years.[1][2][3]
In the 1980s, John began his career as a magazine editor. He worked as the managing editor at Essence, Working Woman, Lear's, and later AARP: The Magazine. Stoltenberg serves as executive editor and Communications Advisor for DC Metro Theater Arts, where he publishes theater reviews, interviews, and essays about live theater in Washington, D.C.[5][6] In 2015, John produced a one-woman play titled Aftermath, which was an edited version of an unpublished essay by Andrea Dworkin. It was edited and directed for the stage by Adam Thorburn.[7][8]
Stoltenberg has written many essays and speeches, as well as a novel, reflecting his pro-feminist sexual politics.[9] Several appeared in the book For Men Against Sexism: A Book of Readings (1977): "Refusing to Be a Man", "Toward Gender Justice", and "Eroticism and Violence in the Father-Son Relationship".[10]
In 1989, he published a collection of his essays, Refusing to Be a Man: Essays on Sex and Justice.[11] Lesbian author Rita Mae Brown stated the book carefully identifies the process by which male identification "affects and distorts men's most intimate capacities."[12] This was followed in 1993 by a second collection The End of Manhood: A Book for Men of Conscience.[13]
In 2013, he published the novel, GONERZ.[14] He has stated the writings of Andrea Dworkin have been the inspiration for his own and he dedicated all three books to her. His work is included in several anthologies including Feminism and Men: Reconstructing Gender Relations and The New Politics of Masculinity: Men, Power and Resistance.[15][16] Stoltenberg has been credited with the quote: "Pornography tells lies about women. But pornography tells the truth about men."[17]
Born and raised in Minnesota, in his early life John was married to a woman and lived within traditional marital roles.[18] After that, John has lived as an out gay man who also uses the term queer. He chose to spend his life with the radical feminist and lesbian, Andrea Dworkin.[19][20][21][22] They were introduced by a mutual friend, a theater director, in 1974, at a meeting of the then-fledgling Gay Academic Union.[21] Later in 1974, after walking out of a poetry reading—a benefit for the War Resisters LeagueinGreenwich Village—due to the misogynist content, they began their decades-long intellectual and personal relationship.[21]
Their agreement was that while they would always live together, they could have relationships outside of their partnership and John did have relationships with men. John and Andrea planned never to marry unless one of two things occurred. As Andrea stated to TheNew York Times in 1985, "unless one of us is terminally ill or jailed for political activity", as she had been at the Women's House of Detention in New York at the age of eighteen.[23] While they intended for the 1985 article to make clear they were not heterosexual, the "editor refused to allow the writer to identify us as gay and lesbian, as we had asked."[21] They married in 1998, due to her ill health.
Their life of 31 years together ended in 2005 with Dworkin's unexpected death from an enlarged heart. Since then, John has lived with his husband, Joe Hamilton, in Washington, D.C.[24]
In addition to joining Dworkin in marches to protest against pornography, Stoltenberg founded Men Against Pornography in New York City, the male branch of Women Against Pornography.[25][26] In the mid-'80s, he created and facilitated "The Pose Workshop", which entailed clothed men adopting the poses that women strike in pornographic shots with direction from other attendees, a version of which was broadcast on BBC television.[27] He used that as an empathy-builder with young men on college campuses and at anti-sexist men's conferences across the US.[28]
He was a founder of the group Men Can Stop Rape and developed the group's “My Strength” poster campaign which aims to educate young men on sexual relationships, consent, and rape.[29][30][31]
Stoltenberg, John (1978). Disarmament and masculinity: An outline guide and bibliography for studying the connection between sexual violence and war. Palo Alto, California: Frog in the Well. OCLC6185444.
Stoltenberg, John (1989). Refusing to be a man: essays on sex and justice. Portland, Oregon: Breitenbush Books. ISBN9780932576736. Reprinted as: Stoltenberg, John (2000). Refusing to be a man: essays on sex and justice. London & New York: UCL Press. ISBN9781841420417. Pdf.
Stoltenberg, John (1977), "Refusing to be a man", in Snodgrass, John (ed.), For men against sexism: a book of readings, Albion, California New York: Times Change Press Distribution, Monthly Review Press, pp. 36–40, ISBN9780878100316.
Stoltenberg, John (1977), "Toward gender justice", in Snodgrass, John (ed.), For men against sexism: a book of readings, Albion, California New York: Times Change Press Distribution, Monthly Review Press, ISBN9780878100316.
Stoltenberg, John (1977), "Eroticism and violence in the father-son relationship", in Snodgrass, John (ed.), For men against sexism: a book of readings, Albion, California New York: Times Change Press Distribution, Monthly Review Press, ISBN9780878100316.
Stoltenberg, John (1990), "You can't fight homophobia and protect the pornographers at the same time: an analysis of what went wrong in Hardwick", in Leidholdt, Dorchen; Raymond, Janice G. (eds.), The sexual liberals and the attack on feminism, New York, New York: Pergamon Press, pp. 184–190, ISBN9780080374574.
Stoltenberg, John (1992), "Pornography, homophobia and male supremacy", in Itzin, Catherine (ed.), Pornography: women, violence, and civil liberties, Oxford England New York: Oxford University Press, pp. 145–165, ISBN9780198257554.
Stoltenberg, John (1993), "Making rape an election issue", in Buchwald, Emilie; Fletcher, Pamela R.; Roth, Martha (eds.), Transforming a rape culture (1st ed.), Minneapolis, Minnesota Emeryville, California: Milkweed Editions, ISBN9781571312044.
Reprinted as Stoltenberg, John (2005), "Making rape an election issue", in Buchwald, Emilie; Fletcher, Pamela R.; Roth, Martha (eds.), Transforming a rape culture (2nd ed.), Minneapolis, Minnesota: Milkweed Editions, ISBN9781571312693.
Stoltenberg, John (1993), "Pornography and freedom", in Russell, Diana E. H. (ed.), Making violence sexy: feminist views on pornography, Buckingham, England and New York City, New York: Open University Press and Teachers College Press, pp. 65–77, ISBN9780335192007.
Stoltenberg, John (1995), "The triangular politics of pornography", in Lederer, Laura; Delgado, Richard (eds.), The price we pay: the case against racist speech, hate propaganda, and pornography, New York City, New York: Hill & Wang, ISBN9780809078837.
Stoltenberg, John (1995), "Pornography and sexual violence: justice and accountability to victims", in Burgonio-Watson, Thelma; et al. (eds.), Called to make justice: collected keynote speeches from the first bi-national meeting of advocates, workers and leaders from religious communities who work to prevent sexual and domestic violence, Seattle, Washington: Center for the Prevention of Sexual and Domestic Violence, OCLC40536815.
Stoltenberg, John (1998), ""I am not a rapist!": Why college guys are confronting sexual violence", in Schacht, Steven P.; Ewing, Doris W. (eds.), Feminism and men: reconstructing gender relations, New York: New York University Press, ISBN9780814780848.
Stoltenberg, John (1998), "Healing from manhood: a radical meditation on the movement from gender identity to moral identity", in Schacht, Steven P.; Ewing, Doris W. (eds.), Feminism and men: reconstructing gender relations, New York: New York University Press, ISBN9780814780848.
Stoltenberg, John (1998), "Learning the F words", in Atkins, Dawn (ed.), Looking queer: body image and identity in lesbian, bisexual, gay, and transgender communities, New York: Haworth Press, pp. 393–412, ISBN9781560239314.
Stoltenberg, John (1999), "How power makes men: the grammar of gender identity", in Kuypers, Joseph A. (ed.), Men and power, Amherst, New York: Prometheus Books, pp. 37–54, ISBN9781573927697
Stoltenberg, John (1999), "Christianity, feminism, and the manhood crisis", in Claussen, Dane S. (ed.), Standing on the promises: the Promise Keepers and the revival of manhood, Cleveland, Ohio: Pilgrim Press, ISBN9780829813074.
Stoltenberg, John (2004), "How men have (a) sex", in O'Connor, Peg; Heldke, Lisa (eds.), Oppression, privilege, and resistance: theoretical perspectives on racism, sexism, and heterosexism, Boston: McGraw-Hill, pp. 349–358, ISBN9780072882438.
Stoltenberg, John (2004), "Pornography and international human rights", in Whisnant, Rebecca; Stark, Christine (eds.), Not for sale: feminists resisting prostitution and pornography, North Melbourne, Victoria: Spinifex Press, pp. 400–409, ISBN9781876756499.
Stoltenberg, John (2006), "Confronting pornography as a civil-rights issue", in Hackett, Elizabeth; Haslanger, Sally (eds.), Theorizing feminisms: a reader, New York Oxford: Oxford University Press, ISBN9780195150094.
Stoltenberg, John (2011), "The politics of refusal", in Ashe, Fidelma (ed.), The new politics of masculinity: men, power and resistance, London: Routledge, ISBN9780415663700.
Stoltenberg, John (2022), "The Civil-Rights Approach to Pornography", in Earp, Brian D.; Chambers, Clare; Watson, Lori (eds.), The Routledge Handbook of Philosophy of Sex and Sexuality, New York, NY: Routledge, pp. 499–512, ISBN9781138370678.
^Stoltenberg, John (2000), "The forbidden language of sex", in Stoltenberg, John (ed.), Refusing to be a man essays on sex and justice, UCL Press, ISBN9781841420417
^"Home page". Sexual Assault Prevention and Response Office (SAPRO). United States Department of Defense. Archived from the original on April 19, 2006. Retrieved September 12, 2014.
Feminism
LGBT
Erotica and pornography
United States
